My First Business Gave Me My First Experience of Panic Attacks

I had never heard the word ‘panic attack’ while I was experiencing it. I just knew my heart would beat very fast, I’d be uncomfortable, confused and sleepless. The only solution I had was to sleep. Once I woke up, I’d pick up my phone and experience more panic attacks. Fast-forward, I got freed from it.

Here’s how it went!

Why It Happened

I was a 21 year old who just recovered from Tuberculosis. I desperately needed money to settle many personal and family needs and was ready to learn how to earn. I worked myself out learning and learning, I read every time my eyes weren’t closed trying to fast track the process. It worked!

People who I looked up to would honestly commend my knowledge, but that’s all I got— commendations, but no recommendations. I was financially broke and rich in commendations. But commendations don’t pay bills, do they?

My learning was super fast. In less than a year or approximately one year, I had learnt HTML, CSS, JavaScript, JQuery and PHP appreciably (I don’t use all of that now and will need revising to remember). I knew that wasn’t enough so I took several business and personal development courses. I spent several months learning sales, SEO, content marketing and blogging and was “good at them all”.

I took my pursuit further by trying to hook up with the people I have met during my several learnings. I gathered a lot of their contacts and we got connected on WhatsApp so I could learn more and the story began!

How It Happened

Here I was waking up daily to screenshots flaunting credit alerts of people who I felt I was smarter than. I went to bed with the feeling of inadequacy, intimidated by the flawless works of people I felt were smarter than I was.

I wasn’t in a competition with them. I’d think to myself and somehow it was true, but something kept on shifting me from my peace. Every time I was away from my phone, I’d encourage myself: 

“Since I am smarter than these people, I’ll make more money than they’re making. Since I’m also learning from these people, I’ll make more money like they’re doing.” My encouragement was true, but there was an unspoken competition.

The next time I picked my phone, like my prediction, more money was made, just that it wasn’t by me. It was either by my new network flaunting their credit alerts, or the mobile network I bought data subscriptions from, or the ‘pro’ I bought another Seven Digit Secret course from.

Every hour seemed like 4 months as I learned but never earned. I was tired. I didn’t want to admit I had a burnout. It is too late to stop, I’d say. But my panic attacks were here again, 5 hours before bedtime.

How It Ended

In frustration and challenge, I wrote an Ebook, and took a step to organize a 2-day free webinar, to sell my book afterwards. Boom! This was my first opportunity to clean off the letter “L” and earn! It was the sweetest experience in a long time, probably because the panic attacks reduced by 50 per cent or I finally could look at my To-Buy list and smile. Whatever it was!

I gathered some money, ran some Facebook ads for the first time, sent out many adverts and was expecting signups. 24 hours to the start of the webinar, no one had signed up. (Here was my first failed Facebook ad, and hopefully my last).

No waiting! I changed my Ad strategy, and paid some of my new network who had large contact lists to advertise to their audience. Some did it for free, others declined and others still, thought it nice to ignore me.

I conducted a survey and found that the average conversion rate for low end products like mine was 10 percent (I sold the book at N1500). By the commencement of the webinar, I had 140 participants.

Anyway, that was just the average. But as someone who had gotten so much knowledge studying business and sales, I couldn’t get an average conversion rate. My knowledge paid off. I mean off!

Drums rolling… I made just 1 sale. That was a 0.71% conversion rate. I was totally numb. Was I to consider the time invested? Or the fact that my ROI was -72%? Or me saying bye to my To-Buy list?

Anyway, it seemed I got what I needed (whatever it was that I needed). All the fire went down. All my fuss for instant conversion of my learning to earning died. And most importantly, the panic attacks ceased. I stopped competing with my network in the name of learning. I stopped viewing their flaunts (WhatsApp status, if you like) except for when I was emotionally stable.

Fast-forward… I came back to myself and looked inwards again. Now, I didn’t just want money— I wanted peace and fulfillment too. Another story started, void of panic attacks (so it can’t be included here), that led the Self Discovery Blog

Here’s What I Learnt

  • You cannot fully thrive in a place you are not naturally fitted for
  • Learning is still the surest way to earn, just that it will take you through a journey of scribbles
  • Self Discovery is a bold step towards peace and fulfillment
  • There’s a thin line between motivation and intimidation. If the source of motivation is not managed or received well, it can be overwhelming and lead to discouragement.
  • There are few times when comparison brings improvement. Most times, it leads to unhealthy competition.
  • Surround yourself with successful people but don’t run your life with their timing
  • Knowledge and experience are two different things. You can’t be a master of the game until you are in it
  • The journey to success should be enjoyed. But if it isn’t enjoyed, turn it into a story others will enjoy

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